Thursday, 17 February 2011

Red Wine Risotto At Dusk.

The last of the evening sun arched with an aching beauty over the silhouetted mountains. Light that was strong enough to see by was long gone, just a glow from beyond the horizon. Down by the campsite, the lake was catching the reflection of the moon. It looked like a shoal of iridescent fish darting around on top of the water. I’m sure I even heard a bat squeaking, although I've been reliably informed that this is not possible for a pair of human ears.

I was in one of my favourite places. I spent the evening making red wine risotto down at the foot of the very mountains I had climbed that day. That evening’s beauty will never be matched.

I don’t want to carry on with this story. I don’t know where I’m going with it. I still haven’t cleaned the olive oil off my gas camping stove or rectified the whole affair with myself. 

It is hard not to become embittered isn't it? When you possess a romantic view of the world, one finds that reality rarely lives up to it. There are bills to pay. There are dentist appointments to make. You can’t go around lighting sparklers when it isn’t bonfire night. I am very aware of the holes in my ability to accept reality.  

As I reach my late twenties, I’m more confused about everything that I’ve ever been before.  Last year I realized that there is only one thing that I’m certain of - that my life is certainly not going to pan out in any way I can possibly imagine right now.

I thought that by my age I might have just started to settle into some kind of proper career, with prospects and direction. I though I might have met some level headed man who might want to purchase a washing machine with me. I though I’d have a ginger coloured cat and a piano that I only played on Sundays. I’ve learned that none of these things are to be the case. Apart from the piano – I do have a piano but I play it all the time, not just on Sundays. I nearly got a cat but it turns out I’m allergic to them.

Life is not all red wine risotto at dusk. Sometimes it is more like butter-less mashed potato at midday. It is very potato like at the moment. So today I went to see a film at the cinema on my own. It wasn’t the most moving story I’ve ever come across but the way it was shot, the soundtrack, the colours and the movement – It made my heart glow and a few tears crept down my face. 

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